"Eating in the field"
Elaine's family ate in the field a lot since Elaine's Dad is a farmer.
Eating in the field meant the family loaded up and took the meal out to the farm fields in the truck.
They would lower the tailgate and had "meals on wheels".
I have eaten a few meals with her family this way when we were dating and my kids had experienced it a few times growing up as well.
Elaine's Dad has since retired from farming and Danny's wife Bree had never "Ate in the field" before.
So we did this night.
Elaine's Mom had a set of Melmac dishes set aside for field meals.
Elaine has inherited those dishes and started a collection of her own dishes as well.
The laundry basket hauled all the plates to the fields as well as the table service.
So the tailgate became the kitchen counter too.
Soapy water was brought to the field in a milk jug and poured over your hands while you scrubbed them together.
Adam, Megan, Bree and Danny.
Cornbread, beef stew and baked beans all made on the fire.
The ladies solved the worlds problems.
The night was going well.
Beautiful weather. Fun visiting with family.
Then the kids wanted scary stories...
The only scary stories I could think of were to scary for for my nieces and nephew.
They kept on insisting that I tell one and try to scare them.
So Joel came up with the plan of hiding in the woods with his turkey call.
It is very load and screechy. It would be perfect.
The plan was he would send me a text when he was in place behind them and I would tell my story and then text him when he to start wailing.
So I began with Bigfoot sightings in the forest behind our home.
I then moved to the coyotes we had recently seen in our driveway.
The bobcat Levi had spotted in our yard.
I then told them about peacocks, on a farm nearby, that sounded like they were a woman screaming "Help!" when they called out.
I think I few in a few other odds and ends in the conversation.
Then I moved to the thing we had been hearing recently but had no idea what it was.
I told them how it would get close to the house and made an awful noise.
I sent my text to Joel.
He began screeching and shaking a nearby bush violently.
They all jumped out of their skin!
The noise continued intermittently.
A screech. A pause and a bush shaking.
They tried to see who was missing form the group.
So I moved closer to the shaking bush and dared them to investigate with me.
They, wanting to prove they were brave, came with me.
Screech and shaking! Jumps and giggles.
I decided to act like I had been grabbed by the awful creature and dive into the bush.
At the same moment Joel decided to rush out and give one final scare to the kids.
BAM! Head to head collision!
My nose gushed pints of blood and I my teeth wiggled in my head.
The kids were loving it.
Joel panicked and ran for paper towels.
The top of his head had slammed right into the bridge of my nose.
For all the bleeding it didn't hurt that bad.
The kids thought it was great.
I looked up at the crowd.
Everyone took turns looking at my face and then quickly turned away.
We went to the emergency room.
I was placed in a room and waited for 5 hours.
Never saw a Doctor and the nurse just wanted my billing information.
At 2 in the morning I watched the doctor Google a diagnosis.
I also watched a guy who came in after me with a broken leg. He complain about not beeing seen after a 4 hour wait.
So I left and Elaine gave them an earful.
My nose was already a little crooked from a break in 8th grade.
After the swelling went down it didn't look near as bad as it did at first but it is more crooked.
Rhinoplasty may be in my future.
That's what I get for scaring little kids.